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Therapist Blog

Denver

Interview with Kate Daigle

Kate Daigle is an Eating Disorder Recovery Therapist in the Denver, CO area.

She has had her practice up and running for 6 years. She focuses on Attachment Theory, Acceptance Commitment Therapy, Narrative Therapy and Body-Center/Somatic Techniques. Check out her website here for more information   

 

Q. Why did you go into this field? 

A. To help others find lasting recovery from disordered eating and body image issues as I have.  I am inspired to support people find a peaceful relationship with food, their bodies and themselves and develop healthy coping mechanisms for life’s challenges.

Q. What are you finding interesting right now? 

A. I’m not quite sure the direction you’re going after with this question as it’s pretty broad.  Right now I’m focusing in on my inner niche of supporting pregnant and new moms who struggle with body image/disordered eating and help to normalize and guide them through the experience of new parenthood.

Q. Who do you serve?

A. I serve women and men who are highly motivated, successful and inspired people who struggle with anxiety and body image issues as a way of trying to cope.  I help them find a balanced approach to definition what truly matters to them and getting it all done while enjoying their lives.

Q. Where are you headed, what are you working on?

A. I’m increasing my speaking presentations for the fall and winter, and focusing in on bringing support to new moms who struggle with anxiety and body image.  I plan to offer presentations to local pregnancy and birth centers and also focus on writing a book on this topic.

Q. If every client was reading this right now, what would you want them to know? 

A. That lasting peace with your body, food, and yourself is possible.

I'm Not Sorry

Apologizing, please pleasing, and disrespecting your self is what has been come to be known as how “women behave”. After embracing the lessons, wisdom and evidence that dialectical behavioral therapy provides I now can truly recognize the importance of being unapologetic of who I am, what I want, how I feel and why I do things. Life is long and hard, yet fleeting. The moments that we have to express ourselves are limited if we spend an abundant amount of time saying or feeling sorry. 

I think the obscene part of the phenomenon of the sorry is that we believe we are acting, saying and feeling sorry for the benefit of others, yet it’s one of the most self involved stance we can take. All sorts of concerned rush through our minds about how people see us, and how we think our impact on people is so immense that we have to apologize. Plus we create a sense of self denial that is illustrated only clearly as being a martyr. 

The skill that illustrates how to become reformed apologizers is the FAST skill.

F- be fair to yourself and others

A- don’t apologize for who you are, what you want or for existing 

S- stick to your values and what you believe 

T- be truthful in every way that you can tolerate

Using this skill can be done all out of order or even sperately. 

When you can maintain your self respect, guilt and shame will likely be decreased when you are doing what you want. When you’re rejected it will be less about how it’s all your fault and more about that it just wasn’t right. 

As a child we are often condition to say “I ‘m sorry”, and often, where its likely to fill any “good little girl/boy” with this deep shame that can lead to doubt and insecurity. However that doesn’t mean that change is impossible, and that it’s wrong to embrace what you have been socialized to believe.

I encourage everyone to be mindful of truly often we say those shame provoking words of “I ‘m sorry”. 

 

Enjoy Life

By doing activities and being around people you like and even love! For example this weekend I spent time painting, and just appreciated the process. 

Too often we all spend time doing things we believe we "have to" and tolerate people that are not pleasant because its "the nice thing to do". I've been guilty of this, feeling like it made me a better person to try to fix, and have patiences with people. Honestly that is only protecting my pride and hurting myself, and possibly the other individuals in the end.

Really what has to happen is you have to stop making yourself be at the mercy of others, and learn to be comfortable with not meeting everyone else's expectations. It takes time to get to the head space of this attitude being comfortable, especially if this attitude is a habituated pattern. While making change, remember to take it moment to moment.

Mindfulness In Denver

Mindfulness has become a buzz word in the business of being "happy" or at "peace". Even the Denver Post, wrote about Mindfulness and how different organizations such as Be Mindful has been focused on reaching out to homeless youth recently right here in Denver. 

Well I do believe they are on to something since being in the here and now can ease anxiety (at times feeling of fear of what is to come) and depression (possible regret of events in the past). It sounds simple enough, just practice being in the here and now, and stretch your brain to focus and bring about emotional regulation.... 

I only wish it was that simple. 

I have found that through practicing mindfulness starting at 3 minutes a day is the best way to start. Its like learning to run a 5K, typically you don't wake up one day and run 3.2 miles for the first time ever without practicing. First you have to warm up, then stretch out your muscles, eat properly. stay well hydrated... and so on. 

Practice and prepare yourself to be mindful. You can do this by practicing yoga, focusing on your breathing pattern, taking a warm bath, walking your dog... Just take three minutes to stop your mind, or looking at your to-do list. Slow your mind down, and intensionally notice what you are feeling, seeing, or experiencing in the moment...

Just 3 minutes thats all it takes to start.